WHERE DOES HE FIND THEM?

You all remember the group, Genesis, don't you? Phil Collins' old group. Now I want you to imagine that Genesis had a massive set of collective testicles. Now, imagine that you had a massive pair of nutcrackers and imagine that you placed Genesis' massive set of testicles within your massive pair of nutcrackers and that you squeezed as hard as you possibly could.

The resulting noise would, I guess, have been pretty much identical to the noise you are about to hear should you decide to press play and try and earn yourself 1500 days off purgatory.

And there's a cherry on the cake. You can actually hear the singer turning over the lyric sheet in the middle of the track. You rarely come across such dedication to professionalism within the recording studio nowadays and let us all thank God for that.

Comments

WHERE DOES HE FIND THEM? — 22 Comments

  1. I never thought much of them when Gabriel left but even with Collins they were never that dire.

    Purgatory never seemed so inviting.

  2. Piece of cake. But I’m fresh from a Bob Dylan concert the other night and so I can take anything.

  3. The page turning is great, and it also sounds as if our singer guy is smacking something at some point. Probably a fly disturbing the recording session.

    Back in the Olden Days when I was Head of A&R for The Wonders of Science Records I received many many demos much more frightening than this. One guy sent me a tape with twelve songs and the words blow job appeared in each song and it wasn’t even a Concept Album.

  4. By about 0:42 there was nothing subdued about my animosity any more.

  5. I am strangely . . . bemused. It’s like trying to watch someone’s child’s music recital. You kinda pull for them, but you look at your watch a lot. I, personally, enjoyed the sound of the microphone being put down, right at the end – none of that fancy mike holder, spit shield nonsense for these musical pioneers, and they achieve the musical equivalent of the hand-hewn log cabin!

  6. Mark, you would make an excellent priest, a bishop even. You lie so convincingly and your pastoral concern should win an oscar.

  7. I made it, ALL THE WAY THROUGH. I want my 1500 days, dammit. What is heard… cannot be unheard… errrgh.

  8. I never renege on my promises, Evan. The 1500 days are yours. In fact, take a bonus 100 days as you seem to be the only person who braved it all. I will also add your name to the list of blessed martyrs.

  9. I didn’t lie!

    I’m poor, and even I don’t live in a hand-hewn log cabin.

    Also, not so much pastoral concern as a sort of morbid curiosity.

  10. And I’ll have you know, no matter how upset I might get, I would never accuse you of making a good bishop.

    That was really hurtful.

  11. You – you mean they HAD a lyrics page? Goodness. The bride and I want our 1500 days. Actually, we are experiencing a major doggie thanksgiving – our two Cavaliers got out of the house this morning and disappeared. They were having a ball running around the neighborhood like little maniacs. Our contractor rounded them up, said when he found them, they knew they were in trouble…. I caught sight of them as they ran up our alley toward the house,but then they veered off and I lost them again. The sad thing is, it was so glorious to see the little guys so happy, running free, and I wish there was a way to let them run off a leash, but we have too much traffic and no dog parks near us. They are home, full of themselves and ready to be spoiled rotten, as is their due.

  12. no dog parks near us

    In Newcastle dogs run free in every park and the council builds enclosures for children. I think this is so that the little tykes don’t scare the dogs or infect them with some nasty human child disease.

    Every day I wake up and thank God I don’t live in the land of the free. I would find all the laws you have there so constricting.

  13. The Bride, here, full of thanksgiving and penitence. I closed the front door, thinking that it would stay closed, since there’s no strong north wind today. WRONG! It didn’t, and what followed were some of the 30 worst minutes of my life. While Strangelove and the contractor were looking around our house, I was out driving the neighborhood. Thanks be to God and these two sensible men! The Dubyas are home, safe and sound.
    Morals of this story: 1. If the people (4 legs or 2) we love are ok, that’s the main thing. If not, we care for them and pray. 2. Everyone out there, don’t trust the hardware. No exceptions.

  14. It’s not the law so much, MP, but the lack of fenced dog parks makes it hard to let dogs run safely, or semi-safely: our vet says many of the infections they see in dogs come from being in dog parks. We have plenty of open walking trails near us – one of them goes for several miles, but it’s on a major street and we can’t let the dogs off the leash because they have no street sense whatever and would not be safe from cars. We need to buy a farm or something when we move to Ft Worth…..

  15. I would have thought training the dogs would be cheaper. I’ll give Cesar Millan a ring and get him to pop round.