People Destined For Hell ( the top twenty )

Ignore all those "biblically-based" lists of people who are going to hell because of what they get up to in bed or what they put on the end of their knobs to stop the conception of babies; this is the definitive list of the damned. Sadly there is the possibility of divine forgiveness if they truly repent but, from experience, I doubt that any of the practitioners of these deadly sins will ever do that.

The more attentive among you will notice that there are only nineteen entries in my top twenty list. This is a deliberate omission which allows you, my heaven-bound friends, to suggest your own hellfire-worthy misdemeanour.

  1. People who deliberately break the speed limit on the public highway.
  2. Cyclists over the age of seven who ride on the pavement, footpaths and in public parks (also cyclists who ignore traffic lights or ride up the inside of other vehicles and those who wear racing gear when they are simply going to work).
  3. People who are quite happy for other people to die painfully and alone during a pandemic if it means they can stay longer in the pub.
  4. Queue-jumpers.
  5. The bad-mannered.
  6. Those who rent out property and property speculators.
  7. Bullies.
  8. Rappers.
  9. People who don’t like dogs or, at the very least, cats.
  10. Vegans unless they keep it to themselves.
  11. People who fart in public and then say “Better out than in.”
  12. Anyone who puts profit before people.
  13. Betrayers.
  14. People who turn the employment of skills and talents into a competition and then make a TV programme out of it; the judges and presenters of such programmes and those who watch them.
  15. The passively boastful.
  16. Splainers of either gender; anyone who begins a sentence with the word “actually.” Those who look down on others.
  17. Celebrities who have not made the world a substantially better or more enjoyable place.
  18. Anyone who has to be in charge of other people.
  19. The Liberal Elite.


People Destined For Hell ( the top twenty ) — 2 Comments

  1. Hmmm. Interesting list, of course, and I agree with much of it.

    That said, I don’t think I know what “the Liberal Elite” is and/or what’s bad about them!