I really do not believe I can go through another year without being able to carry out my priestly ministry within a real-life community. I am not necessarily looking for paid work or full-time work; I am just looking for somewhere to belong and be useful.
Why is nobody who could help me, or who could introduce me to somebody who could help me, prepared to do so? I have to conclude that it is simply because they do not believe I should be allowed to practice my calling.
I suspect that soon my body will take pity on my mind and put a stop to the anguish once and for all as I am incapable of taking that step myself.