This is a comment that I have just left on one of Rosie Harper's facebook posts. Some hater is insisting that women who are denied equal opportunity in the Church of England do not really suffer. I am not alone in my condemnation of his heartlessness.

I am a priest who for three and a half years now has not been allowed to officiate for no reason other than I get on the wick of people who consider themselves important and without any due process or disciplinary action whatsoever. It has been the most painful experience of my life and I have previously been through some hellish times. I see my life disappearing without me being able to fulfil the reason why I am alive. Of course, I cannot know for sure, having never been in such a situation, but I believe that how I feel must be very similar to a parent who has had an only child taken from them. Everyday I wake up and the first thing I think about is the taking away of my vocation and I think "What's the point." In fact getting out of bed requires great effort as I can see no point in doing so. I am a dead man walking. 

Anybody who believes that the withholding of a person's understood vocation in life does not result in existentialist suffering of the highest degree is flirting with psychopathy. At the very least they seem incapable of empathy. Not that the empathetic are always much better as most people will cross the road to avoid coming face to face with such suffering and will certainly have ready excuses as to why they cannot help. Perhaps it is this refusal of church members to look at suffering that results in the ridiculous belief that there is no suffering. "I see no ships."



  1. Jonathan,

    Why do you persist in this self-pitying fiction? You were offered a clear path to PTO and you rejected it. All you had to do was attend a church for 6 months and it would have been yours. The fact that you don’t have PTO is your own making, not the Diocese’s.