KENDRICK BANNED FROM FRONTLINE

At an emergency meeting of the United Nations on Friday, the delegates voted almost unanimously that the playing of "Shine, Jesus shine" very loudly as part of a military operation is against the Geneva Convention and a dastardly thing to do. The United States was the only country that refused to condemn the use of dreadful worship songs in the military arena. In a statement, the US Defence Secretary, in association with the Fox Broadcasting Company, insisted that as they had been getting away with torturing anybody they liked for years he saw no reason why they should stop now.

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