WHERE DOES HE FIND THEM?

I've got a bad back and it's making me more grumpy than usual (yes, it is possible). What's more, I really don't see why I have to suffer alone. I want you to hurt like I do. And this song will accomplish that without any problem. Not only is the song truly dreadful, the singing, completely cringeworthy, and the lyrics full of accidental double entendre that would have made Benny Hill blush, it also has a record sleeve that truly reflects the awfulness of what it contains inside. I shall give you 1000 days off purgatory if you get all the way through it and compensation of a further 1000 days off if you are driven to give your life to Satan because of the experience.

Comments

WHERE DOES HE FIND THEM? — 16 Comments

  1. Do you know MP, if that is really the best you can do for your long-suffering ‘fans’, dare I say it, you almost deserve a bad back.
    Sorry, didn’t mean it.
    Please give me my 2000 days.
    Gee, it’s dark down here!

  2. It’s too early in the morning and I’m too caffeine deprived even to THINK of listening to this.

    I figure I ought to get some days off just for having that cover come into my line of vision.

    Merciful heavens!

  3. Are all the songs on the album like that? Catchy tune, I shall be humming it all day. Thank you for sharing that Gawd-awful song…
    Hope your back feels better.

  4. We used to sing that song when I was a child in the AofG church. It makes me think of skating, what with that 3/8 thang going. This guy’s singing isn’t terrible; he hits all the notes, but I must say I was intrigued by the strange guitar on the left speaker and the pianist’s tinkling about towards the last verse. However, the string machine sweetening the producer used was truly terrible. Easiest 2000 days off purgatory I’ve ever made.

  5. You are a git and I claim my 1000 days.

    And why does Jesus want to “Come in again?” Something to do with standing outside the door and knocking?

    We used to have ladies of easy virtue who did that outside the door of Cobridge church in Stoke-on-Trent. We put up a security light and there was a little note left a few days later thanking us since they could now see what they were doing!

  6. I have encountered even worse lyrics, and while he is a bit over the top, there are worse singers. Whoever arraigned the completely failed attempt at music however, must surely work for Screwtape!

    I get my time off, so I am looking for a good sin to commit. Note to readers, only ladies of easy virtue are invited to help with this part of the project.

    FWIW
    jimB

  7. I’m still waiting for MP to publish the video of the wholesome Christian singers on The Lawrence Welk Show singing “One Toke Over the Line, Sweet Jesus” in their cutesy, sappy get-ups. Absolutely hysterical because you know they had no clue whatsoever what they were singing about – they just thought they were singing about Jesus.

  8. Easy as pie! 1000 days thank you. I’m with SR, same question: Why is he singing that Jesus has come in again? Is it a complaint? Is he implying that Jesus is making a pest of himself?

  9. I claim the full 1000 days, but EHC ducked out onto the front porch to escape it. Some people just have no dedication…..

    • Do the math, Strangelove. EHC’s failure cancels out your 1000 days. All that pain for nothing. Never mind, I’ll be posting another one soon.