DON’T BLAME MADPRIEST, BLAMETHAT WICKED VICAR FROM SUFFOLK

A group of friends from the village Church decided it would be a a good idea to get together on a regular basis, socialize, and play games. The lady of the Manor House offered to host their first meeting and also cook them dinner. It was a spectacular affair and everyone agreed it had been a great success. And so they began meeting together once a month, and when it came time for Al and Janet to be the hosts, Janet wanted to outdo all the others. She decided to have mushroom-smothered steak, but when she came to buy the mushrooms the local shop had run out. "What am I going to do?" she asked her husband. "I need mushrooms for the main course." Her husband replied, "Why don't you go down to the field by the river. There are plenty of mushrooms there." Janet said, "But I won't be able to tell the safe mushrooms from the poisonous ones." Al replied, "Well, I've seen some wild animals eating them, so they must be okay."

So Janet decided to give it a try. Early next morning she went down to the mist-covered meadow and picked a large basketful of wild mushrooms. Back in her kitchen she washed, sliced, and diced them for her smothered steak. Then she went out into the front garden and gave Ol' Spot, their faithful spaniel, a double handful. Ol' Spot ate every bite. All morning long, Janet watched Ol' Spot and the wild mushrooms didn't seem to affect him, so she decided to use them.

The meal was a great success, and Janet even hired a young girl from the village to help her serve. After everyone had finished, they relaxed, socialized, and some played dominoes. About an hour after the meal the young girl helper lady came into the room and whispered in Janet's ear, "Mrs. Williams, Ol' Spot is dead."

Janet went into hysterics and ran out of the room.

After she finally calmed down, she called the doctor and told him what had happened. The doctor said, "That's bad, but I think we can take care of it. I will call for an ambulance and I will be there as quickly as possible. Everything will be fine. Just keep them calm.."

Soon the guests could hear the siren of the ambulance was coming down the road. The paramedics and the doctor had their emergency cases, syringes, and a stomach pump. One by one, they took each person into the bathroom and pumped out their stomach. After the last one was finished, the doctor came out and said, "I think everything will be fine now," and he left.

Everyone sat around the room feeling pretty washed out, and Janet decided that they all needed a good stiff drink. Calling the young girl across she said, "Would you go and fetch the cooking sherry and the glasses from the kitchen?" Certainly, madam," replied the girl. "But isn't it awful about Ol' Spot. You know, the car that ran him over never even stopped!"

Comments

DON’T BLAME MADPRIEST, BLAMETHAT WICKED VICAR FROM SUFFOLK — 6 Comments

  1. Um, not laughing.

    {{{Spot}}}

    Yes, even fictional dogs get Golden Tails. That’s how Dog-Spelled-Backwards rolls…

  2. Saintly Ramblings, who is the sender in of this joke, delights in tricking saintly people like yourself, Rick+, into such lapses of correct thinking. He is the small satan of Suffolk.

  3. I soured on the joke at the point she feeds questionable mushrooms to her dog…but then at times I have no sense of humor.