THE SOPPY SAILOR SELECTION

From THE GUARDIAN:

Things were looking grim when Bostie the budgie, presumably an escaped pet, found himself flying too far from land off the Devon coast. But he had a stroke of luck when he found a perch on the Royal Navy frigate HMS Westminster and dined in style in an officer's cabin.

The arrival of the yellow and green bird caused amusement on board the frigate as it took part in a training exercise off Plymouth. The animal landed on top of one of the sailors, was named Bostie – after a type of cross-bred terrier – and given a meal of bread, nuts and water.

But when a routine alarm sounded the budgerigar appeared to suffer a heart attack. Attempts to revive him failed and the crew gave their feathered friend a burial at sea.

Lieutenant Commander Nick Wood had spotted the tame budgie sitting on top of a communications box onboard. He said: "I'll miss Bostie. He was only in our lives for a brief time, but he made our day."

COMMENT: There, you see, the haters were right. Already the greatest fighting force the universe has ever known (even better than the Klingons) is deteriorating into total soppiness. The next thing you know we'll have Royal Navy captains walking around the poop deck with a persian cat in their arms asking their able seamen if they want a stroke.

Thanks to the original Soppy Sheila for sending this sad, but somehow uplifting, story into MadPriest Towers.

Comments

THE SOPPY SAILOR SELECTION — 19 Comments

  1. Aw, poor Bostie. We barely knew ye.

    Royal Navy captains walking around the poop deck with a persian cat in their arms asking their able seamen if they want a stroke

    Pet my pussy? O_o

  2. Awwww, lovely Bostie. What a sweetheart. Budgies are fabulous little birds. He was probably stressed already from being lost at sea. I might start crying if I think about it too much (even though keeling over during an alarm shows impeccable comic timing). Rest in peace little birdie.

  3. Fair enough. It was just the dropping dead with fear that made me wonder if it might be one of yours.

    And you are right, they are lovely. And my “Golden Wattle” cookery book tells me how to cook them to perfection.

  4. Mad Priest, you did once claim you didn’t really even know how to heat water, so I don’t think the budgies of Newcastle have too much to fear from your culinary talents just yet 🙂

  5. I was lying about the water. I am, of course, like all true renaissance men, a brilliant cook. However, although I have the recipe for cooking budgies, I have neither the inclination, or budgie, to do so.

  6. So British sailors have those cute little bows on their caps. That is very gay.

    Does putting the name of their ship on their cap get them home safely when they get drunk on leave?

  7. Hmmmm!! about being such a great cook-
    I seem to remember a time when Mrs MP was going to be away for some reason and you asked plaintively “and who is going to cook my dinner?” – what is a poor lurker to believe?
    :>) Nij

  8. It’s probably best to take everything with a pinch of salt, Nij. And in the case of steamed budgerigar, a sprinkle of pepper, as well.

  9. “Budgerigar” does allegedly mean “good to eat”, though you wouldn’t get too much meat off one, especially not if it was wild. Cockatoos are very tough, apparently. If IT’s white-capped pionus ever goes too far with its displays of bad temper, she may wish to report back on its culinary qualities, such as they may be.

    What’s the budgie recipe, then, Mad Priest? … I notice you mention steaming it, so that takes us back to “heating up the water” as the basic skill level required.

  10. … oh come on, Mad Priest, surely you can just make one up? I don’t believe a budgie recipe would tax your powers of invention too far.

    I’ll start you off with this recipe for cooking cockatoo: “Catch your cockatoo, boil it with two stones and when the stones are soft, your bird is ready.”

  11. They use tomato ketchup.

    Tracie got the recipe from you then? … “MadPriest’s Scrumptious Steamed Budgie with Tomato Ketchup”