SAINT MIRACULOUSLY TURNS INTO CAT

Alleged "relics of Joan of Arc," under the care of the Archbishop of Tours in Chinon, France, do not contain the charred remains of the saint but consist of a mummified cat leg bone and human rib. The bones date from the 6th-3rd century BC, according to a new study.

The bottle containing the bones first surfaced at a pharmacy in 1867. Its label read: "Remains found under the pyre of Joan of Arc, maiden of Orleans." The "relics," have fooled onlookers for decades.

COMMENT: I very much doubt they fooled all onlookers. In fact, it was probably only the completely credulous ones, the sort of people who would believe Pope Pius XII was a saint, who went fell it. Everybody else probably just assumed someone was out to make money from a load of old cat bones.

Comments

SAINT MIRACULOUSLY TURNS INTO CAT — 16 Comments

  1. Ah, Mon Pere, a cat surely has a better chance of entering the Kingdom that a Frenchie? Especially after the snail eating mongrels stuffed us at the Rugby yesterday!

  2. It might have been a holy cat, of course. One who performed all sorts of miracles and only asked for a nice tummy tickle in return.

  3. Come off it Mon Pere, we lost playing a proper team; your opposition think singing bass, sh***ing sheep and eating leeks are acceptable national characteristics!

  4. That’s not true MP – everyone knows about “Puss Puss of Arc”, the tabby of Orleans, who heard God tell her to wage war against the English, got dressed up in boy’s clothes and broke the spirit of the Brits during the Hundred Years’ War, till the English caught her and had her tragically put down at the vet’s.

  5. Yes. I’ve known a lot of people who regularly heard God speaking to them. None of them were what you would call saints and most of them responded well to treatment.

    No, the only real guarantee of sanctity is Englishness. And the vet thing was just a story put about by the French who had, in reality, taken Puss Puss and barbecued her to have for supper along with a few snails (I don’t know their names).

  6. well, I did hear rumours that St Ribbip, the holy frog of Lourdes, and his friend and fellow monastic St Kermit the Hermit had met a similar fate, so perhaps you may be right, MP

  7. No, no, no: the REAL difference between the Scots and the Welsh is that we’ve been successfully ripping them off fiscally for the best part of 400 years.

    If you can’t them, cheat them!

  8. Maybe Joan was an Egyptian?

    In any case, I’d sooner trust a cat to intercede than a nationalistic, kill-crazy shizophrenic! Sorry, but Joan’s not one of my favorites. It’s like Thomas More – the only thing either did to be canonized for was die. The French have Martin of Tours who was a decent(ish) kind of soldier – so why so much about St. Louis (king, power-consolidator – inherently violent) and St. Joan (violent, possibly-delusional cross-dresser)?

  9. “And the vet thing was just a story put about by the French who had, in reality, taken Puss Puss and barbecued her to have for supper along with a few snails (I don’t know their names).”

    This is just silly. Who would remember the names of some snails hundreds of years later?

  10. Who would remember the names of some snails hundreds of years later?

    This is a bit harsh on the snails, isn’t it? …

    Some of my best friends are snails.